10:04 p.m. - 14th December 03
Fairytale of NY
Tried to write to you today, my friend of nearly nine years but ripped it up. Wanted to explain to you about my feelings associated with you and how confused everything is becoming, wanted to explain about my illness...but it all became too muddled so I threw it away.
Popped to buy pressies for the family and went to see A at work before heading off to my home City....A in floods of tears re G...was really, really late getting to the City.
N&J new house is massive, money ooozing everywhere, visit going OK until my dearest bruv mentioned how much he made from selling my moms house...I felt furious as, in reality he should only have had half the house and the rest should have been split three ways. It's so annoying given that I am back to buying a smaller house for more money on my own...but hey so what the hell ....they say life is too short.
Popped to see A on the way back..far calmer.
Normality returns tomorrow...gym and work, which helps.
Words to the Pogues song keep going over and over in my head all the time...Fairytale of NY
When we went back to JJ's 5/12 she was playing it, Ads stormed off complaining people weren't being patriotic....the devil playing up...you scum bag you maggott you cheap lousy faggot. Now the boy in the big apple...the song is driving me completly crazy...Argh, fuck shit!!!
