10:30 p.m. - 14th November 03
Bickering and intimacy
Wednesday, was stressy at work, in our absence trouble had come in the shape of GG, surprised as I was the problem is now resolved...you and I back working together to solve the issues, until the end of Jan...the games yesterday were amazing, intimate and exclusive, you didn't even go to the gym, we were togethr from 08.30-09.45 and then from 12.00-19.00 all work related, but fun....so much fun.
Today we got loads of work done, but then you looked tired, the tiredest I've seen, I'm worried about the increased drinking and early morning wakening again sweetie...What the hell are those damn demons about baby boy?
You're seeing your new women tonight, but you've phoned twice, to see if I got my mortgage, which I did and to tell me you are going gym again, why phone? Tomorrow would do. A, who I was visiting, was dead excited, dead excited. I've said not to be....nowt will happen, I'm just glad we are friends again....I have missed safe hugs and our strange, intimate conversations that are about nothing but everything, only A understands, people have always thought we are mad together.
Saw Ads tonight, even he thinks we are bonkers, says he wishes we stop bickering, HE doesn't understand the fun of the bickering, that's when we know things are good and safe, bickering and point scoring are superb, safe and fun, intimate and interesting, what's not good is not speaking,....I love the games/antics fun and so do you, nobody else except A a little understands us do they?? Safe intimacy, no complications for either of us.
What A says is, how can a man and woman be so close, share the same ideas, feelings (or lack of them!!! Finish sentances, not talk, but know what the other is thinking, for nine years and not sleep together? But the fact we haven't done anything more than hug EVER, is why isn't it sweetie? Emotional intimacy/safety for both of us and we bothe love it.
