10:15 a.m. - 29th August-18th September
Booked tickets for the Pogues hoorah
29th It's odd with no mommy S she's on holiday's and away...I miss her, but am chuffed they are getting a holiday. Fed the dogs, hung around. A phoned me for dinner...didn't answer the phone. Couldn't be bothered.
30th Due in at work at 7....got there at 8...well it's a bank holiday why worry? Boy looking for me...dropped him home at the end of the day.
31 Ads told me he loves me...I love him too...just not in that way, Oh fuck my head is all over the place...behaving like a spaz...not well
2nd Went for first counselling hmmmmmm. The boys sisters do tonight. Me anxious +++++ Boy not speaking to A, arrived anxious. A stressing 'cause boy aint speaking to her...spoke loads to J, who has become soooooooo warm to me Hmmmmm Spoke to P as well I like P loads. A went to bar, boy spoke to me loads, told me he aint igoring me, but aint speaking to A.
They were moving on...J insisting I came and leave A, couldn't do that to A so came home.
3rd Nowt much really
4th Weekends are going quickly...mommy S back, saw her briefly but it's A's do night. How awful was that? It was like the boys hate committee. Jenny, Tom, A lucky Flossies mom and frinds were there too. I wanted to leave early but ended up staying as soooooo few people turned up.
5th Saw mommy S briefly, saw M told her about hospital and counselling.
6th Thank fuck for mommy S ...boy full on ARGH...went to a psychic...not good. On the way to pick up Flossies mom, saw boy, bibbed horn he text me...ur horn is crap. On the way back saw him again...bibbed him again...another text, better horn
7th Text from Tenerife from J AND P bizarre. Boy full on
8th Boy full on and fantastic...then THE meal out, me behving like a spaz...ALLLLLLL work people no eye contact with boy, he left early, I cried when I got home and got spazzed.
9th....Mad stuff...boy on about his holiday 11th Oct...he's mad, he keeps changing stuff. He never enjoyed hot holidays, now going with S & M alledgedly, dates have changed 100 times....I'm going 29th or 30th Oct with I,I,I to a Canary Island somewhere.
Two texts from J, asking me to txt her bruv...which I did...bizarre.
10th...Nice night in with mommy S again, sorted out the pig. J plastered when he got back to pick mommy S up. I love mommy S she's always NORMAL
11th...Saw A, vitriolic about boy...wants to come back...text boy and told him...he said he'd rather lick a cactus...that's funny.
12th Saw mommy S...she's ALRIGHT. Text from boys sis, telling me she has a pressie for me.
13th...With boy majority of day
14th He's giving mixed messages again..went to see my man in B for 2nd counselling, it made more sense today...booked another 6 weeks worth.
15th Saw his sis...she bought me a lovely handbag. 11pm text from boys sis inviting me to Chrimbo dinner with boy...argh
16th Text boys sis...said yes...if boy aint loved up...don't know if sis is meddling
17th Stranger than strange madness going on. Boy's sis arrived on our break in our staff room...NEVER,EVER before has this happened. Conversation was odd....Pogues playing in Brum etc, then she asked what time I was finishing work ...and then asked him, said we two should both go and get pissed together...I said no as booking my holiday. Madness
10pm mommy S and A here, we had bought wine for me, Schnapz for mommy S and chocolate for A...text arrived from J, in S & H come for a drink, boy cumming too....mad rush to get ready, all drunk...well a little tipsy anyway...mommy S wouldn't come, A wasn't allowed. Arrived all anxious chatting to J who kept telling me to sit next to boy...too scared. Boy said we were having girly talk...and sat at bar...we went to leave a little later he said stay..we did two more drinks...now 1am argh.
Boy said he would walk up to P with me...which he did I linked arms, but he seemed stiff and not comfortable, me anxious and wobbling on. Boy walked past P and suddenly realised he had...so crossed over to go home....bizarre...I said what no hug? He came back...and grabbed me tight. I held him very tight too....it was very different our bottom halves were pushed so hard together and I could feel what I felt...he was moaning slightly and then off we went...in opposite directions.
Mommy S has gone mad...she said I should have asked him again to come home, I should have kissed him or just given him a clue....I thought he wanted to go home, he was tipsy, he only came for a hug cause I asked him...I'm a prat.
18th Bought 4 Pogues tickets...text J to tell her I bought the tickets...she said yippee...how much I said �25 each.
Later I drove past W and boy and sis were in there together, shortly after, J text how many tickets? I said one each but not how many...
