8:15 p.m. - 6th January 2006
NY commitments and milk buying
Work life, post Chrimbo/NY has started its madness.....everybody is back....12 hours solid ... no luch....yeah oh yeah!!!
Next week is crazier....Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday there isn't a second between the hours of 08.00-17.00 in which to open post, answer e-mails, eat lunch or breathe...never mind answer phone calls....or have a wee.....NOTE TO SELF: Buy inco pads/get a catheter!!!
What else then? I've been in a fantastic mood all week!! High as a kite. Everybody else seems to have post Chrimbo blues, I see it as new starts, new opportunities and 359 days left to make new things happen? I know that it'll get to me in the end too....but hey let me enjoy it whilst it lasts!
So what about life eh? What are the resolutions? ...No real resolutions...Just real commitments...Covey/Mind gym sort of ones..Thought about the areas of life that need to be developed....for me, it's relationships....Feck that's scary! Socialising...possible but scary too....commitment to my very expensive gym membership.....at least 5/7 days as I used to do.
So gym's easy. As from tomorrow it's scheduled back into my life. Tone myself back up as there are one or two of my fave colthes (pink jacket etc) that aren't as comfy as they were.
Social life, stop declining invites (soz E and NY EVE)! Accept all invites, well some to start with ....can't do overload now can I?
Relationships,...now here is the toughy...for me. Allow myself to be chatted up...I have had opportunities, I am funny, I'm good company,interesting, engaging and well read, all these things people have told me...I find it hard some days to acceprt, but on a good day, know it to be true.
FEAR is what holds me back, but fear is also an excuse....fear of being hurt is my excuse. Counter argument to that, is what happens if I'm missing out 'cause of it? I only get hurt if I allow myself to be hurt...GUPLS!...Long pause....off to make tea, whilst I think about this somemore. Good old Brits eh? Tea is the cure all!
Tea made, not much thought about it...why? Running out of milk! Should I go to the shop tonight or in the morning? Stop me procrastinating.....It has to be when this entry ends!
OK.....Read all the books and articles...I know I have to be open to a relationship. Not to expect one....(Ads is always telling me nobody is going to beat my door down...thank God!) But at least appear ameniable, open and accept compliments and interest. A date, doesn't mean a shag, marriage and trauma. It's just what it says....a drink/pictures/meal...a social occasion, to learn more about somebody and could actually be a laugh, expand my friends...and I LOVE a laugh/laughing and feeling happy. So OK that's my commitments to myself.
Tomorrow 2pm.....Gym....cross trainer, steps, weights and 20-30 lengths of swimming...OH deep joy!...The pay off....my pink jacket'll fit me properly....come March/April (none coat/pink jacket weather) I'll be over the moon, overjoyed, chuffed to fuck etc etc etc!
Monday for work. Best thin gal trousers.....heels, new stripy cardigan...chin up and smile etc!
Go out with Ads without fail for a meal next week.
That's that then....now though, wrap up, arse up to the shop....milk purchasing needed
