10:42 a.m. - 14th September 2008
I survived Phew
Bizarre day yesterday. Went to one of the villages to buy two birthday presents. There is a shop there that sells loads of nothingness type dooberry stuff. It's quite an expensive shop full of nothingness, that suits women that have it all....SO spent �50 on nothingness and drove back I thought I vaguley heard my mobile phone but wasn't sure. As a law abiding person I wouldn't have answered it anyway.
Went to Sainsbury as it was closer to the village with the shop full of nothingness spent a bomb on fine food and drink as le family miserable were visiting. In the car park my phone started ringing, realised at this point I had 8 missed calls and three text messages, never been heard of belive me!
Boss stuck in the middle of nowhere and car won't start....Bow..locks! (Why me??? Why not her hubby or her bruv in law???) I had loads to do including making puddding and chilling it and stuff. She thought she was out of petrol I had no petrol container and neither did she. Phoned the ever trustworthy Ads, who was at the petrol station and not a million miles away from boss. SO he went to her aid, except it wasn't petrol it was a jump lead jobby....but he being alllllll manly, even had jump leads about his person.
Got home and L turned up for a coffee I was running out of time to get organised as she then stopped for a second......so I flew around after she had gone, making sure the tops of doors were immaculate and dust fee and that there wasn't an ounce of dust on any lampshade in the house.
Le familie miserables turned up at 20.28, they left at 22.18 so just shy of the predicted two hours, all the time they were cramming food in their mouths or drinking, the second they finished they were gone.
Lots of interesting snippets, C has moved out. They have had their extention built, they now have seven bedrooms. Oh how poor they are!! They are off to New York in Dec, paid for by eldest daughter.
BUT I survived, didn't make an ass of myself, took the insults on the chin without getting ratty and only drank wine once they had gone!!
Insult one-I always forget just how tiny your house is, I couldn't stand living somewhere so tiny......Hmmm had I not executed my parents wills to ensure that everyone had a share, I would too be living in Buckingham Palace.
Insult two-Do you still go to the gym? 'Cause you look like you are putting on weight-have you thought of weight watchers, it's helped me?
(I am UK size 10-12 and 5'8/9" as opposed to the Queen who is Size 14/16 and about 5'5" on a good day).
Insult three - Oh gosh fancy choosing those glasses, I would never have chosen them they make you look so old. Hmmm funny thing is nobody else has said that at all, everybody who has commented has been very complimentary.
They wrapped up the left over chicken and half pudding and took it northwards, promising to be in touch soon.
Interestingly I then loaded and emptied the dishwasher, loaded it for a second time and turned that on, I now have my wrecked looking kitchen to clean and the dining room floor which has more sweetcorn on it than you can shake a stick at!
BUT I am on holiday on a few days and hopefully it will be all nice and sunny, although to be fair today is a lovely day here and proper old grass cutting weather. L and I will go out somewhere nice this afternoon for a walk as Hunk is working today.
